These are a Few of my Least Favorite Things

Recently, I've been mooning over Jogja and indulging in some super pointless future-nostalgia ("I'm going to miss Indonesia so much blahblahblah"), so it was almost refreshing to have a series of super-frustrating things happen to me this week. It was time for a reality check. Hence the inspiration for the list:

Things I Will Not Miss About Indonesia 

1. Being judged based on the color of my skin and the shape of my nose.
2. Being treated like an idiot or someone with no character just because I'm not fluent in Indonesian or Javanese; alternately having people give up on a communication before it's even begun because they are too lazy to engage in a non-fluent communication or assume that I don't speak Indonesian (even when I am speaking Indonesian in their face)
3. Consistently breathing air full of cigarette smoke (inside), artificial perfumes, or black fuel exhaust
4. Not having my own  a) kitchen  b) bathroom, especially sink and mirror  c) living space
5. Covering my body all the time or feeling shame when I don't; always being conscious of the way I move my body in public
6. Pretending that I don't have sexuality or sexual needs or feeling shame when I do
7. Having the professional responsibility of someone twice my age
8. Lacking any socially acceptable outlet for drinking/partying/dancing
9. Never hearing western classical music
10. Being bit by insects INDOORS
11. All of my clothes molding and never getting properly cleaned
12. HELMET HAIR

Of course the "Things I Will Miss About Indonesia" is a longer and more important list, but it's nice to dwell for a minute on the imperfections. I've fallen in love with this place, and in many ways have become the infatuated lover that puts their partner on a pedestal. I could gush about the view of Jogja from my zippy motorbike seat, tell you how I adore the cool tingle of morning sun 350 days a year and imagine spending an interminable evening Jogja-style chatting and drinking ginger tea. But the feeling that I had for the first 15 months of being here--that this place judges me, hurts me, alienates me--shouldn't be forgotten. 

When I can remember the flaws, both trivial and serious, I can learn to love Jogja more completely for what it really is. And in the meantime, I can get some seriously cheap spa treatments to compensate for all the other shit.