American Girls
24 January 2011
So I just got back from a trip to Vietnam and Cambodia, the last leg of which I was "by myself" in Hanoi. Really when you are backpacking a worn path, you are never by yourself, but with hundreds of other disenchanted 18 to 35 year-olds looking to lose themself or find themself or something a little less or a little more cliché.
There are all kinds of people who, for one reason or another, take off from their land of residency and wander the southeast asian mainland. Some are on two-week holidays from university, while some people break up with their girlfriends, quit their jobs, and set out on the open road for months, even years, with no sign of turning back. Some people are trust-fund babies, with unlimited budgets, choosing to stay in backpacker's hostels for the romance and grit, and some have scrimped and saved for years to make this trip happen. A lot of stories start to sound the same, but actually it's just the way we have of paraphrasing the experience: "Yea I was just in [other southeast asian country]... been traveling for [x number of months]... looking for a job [usually teaching english in thailand]".
There are endless variations on a theme, and what it really comes down to is that people are out there because they are interested in seeing the world, no matter what their method of exploration, time frame or budget. That being said, it's impossible to avoid stereotypes when people from dozens of countries around the world (though usually Britain, mainland Europe, the US and Australia) are bumping elbows around the hostel breakfast table. It's easy to be surprised that people you meet are not representative of the national stereotype you imagined, and yet it makes perfect sense: one person never describes a whole nationality or group identity. Despite this most basic fact, the most frequent comment I get while traveling is something like, "If you are American, why are you so cool?"
At first, it seems like a compliment. It's nice to stand out in a group, especially when the stereotype of that group is generally negative: Americans are perceived as loud, disrespectful and arrogant in many countries. Even I've witnessed groups of American travelers who fit that exact description, but let's be honest... any large group can get pretty obnoxious, regardless of the color of their passport. Have you ever been to an art museum in Italy during Chinese tourist season?
After a while, I started to see this comment as kind of strange... the note of surprise in their voice, "But you are so nice for an American girl!" or "You're not stupid at all!" as if this fact contradicted certain forces of nature. A Vietnamese man even told me, "I thought you were half Vietnamese because you are so much less fat than other Americans!"
Now let's think about it. I would NEVER go up to a British person and say, "Wow you are so not arrogant and condescending!" or a French person and say, "It's great that you are not a wretched snob!" or to my new Australian friends: "I just don't understand why you're not drunk and obese!" So why do people say similar things to me?
It might be partly because the type of Americans who travel are willing to take it. The Bush years were a humiliating time to be abroad, and we couldn't help but make some apologies for our country, and by extension, our people. Further, those of us who are educated and interested in the world around us want to differentiate from the "dumb American"... and so we make fun of them too, and sort of count ourselves out.
For me, it's over. I AM AMERICAN. I am also smart and considerate, humble and strongly motivated to engage with the world. These things do not make me separate from the American identity, but in fact describe it! I am so so proud of my blue passport, and I absolutely will not apologize for it any more. There are stupid assholes of every ethnicity just as there are wonderfully brilliant people from every state in the world. There happen to be a lot of kind, creative and worldly people from the USA, so I suggest the world get to know them.
So the next time someone tells you that you aren't like an American, or as one very nice but confused Dutch boy told me, "You don't match my vision of American girls at all...", feel free to use my line:
"I am exactly an American girl. You just need to expand your vision, my friend."
There are all kinds of people who, for one reason or another, take off from their land of residency and wander the southeast asian mainland. Some are on two-week holidays from university, while some people break up with their girlfriends, quit their jobs, and set out on the open road for months, even years, with no sign of turning back. Some people are trust-fund babies, with unlimited budgets, choosing to stay in backpacker's hostels for the romance and grit, and some have scrimped and saved for years to make this trip happen. A lot of stories start to sound the same, but actually it's just the way we have of paraphrasing the experience: "Yea I was just in [other southeast asian country]... been traveling for [x number of months]... looking for a job [usually teaching english in thailand]".
There are endless variations on a theme, and what it really comes down to is that people are out there because they are interested in seeing the world, no matter what their method of exploration, time frame or budget. That being said, it's impossible to avoid stereotypes when people from dozens of countries around the world (though usually Britain, mainland Europe, the US and Australia) are bumping elbows around the hostel breakfast table. It's easy to be surprised that people you meet are not representative of the national stereotype you imagined, and yet it makes perfect sense: one person never describes a whole nationality or group identity. Despite this most basic fact, the most frequent comment I get while traveling is something like, "If you are American, why are you so cool?"
At first, it seems like a compliment. It's nice to stand out in a group, especially when the stereotype of that group is generally negative: Americans are perceived as loud, disrespectful and arrogant in many countries. Even I've witnessed groups of American travelers who fit that exact description, but let's be honest... any large group can get pretty obnoxious, regardless of the color of their passport. Have you ever been to an art museum in Italy during Chinese tourist season?
After a while, I started to see this comment as kind of strange... the note of surprise in their voice, "But you are so nice for an American girl!" or "You're not stupid at all!" as if this fact contradicted certain forces of nature. A Vietnamese man even told me, "I thought you were half Vietnamese because you are so much less fat than other Americans!"
Now let's think about it. I would NEVER go up to a British person and say, "Wow you are so not arrogant and condescending!" or a French person and say, "It's great that you are not a wretched snob!" or to my new Australian friends: "I just don't understand why you're not drunk and obese!" So why do people say similar things to me?
It might be partly because the type of Americans who travel are willing to take it. The Bush years were a humiliating time to be abroad, and we couldn't help but make some apologies for our country, and by extension, our people. Further, those of us who are educated and interested in the world around us want to differentiate from the "dumb American"... and so we make fun of them too, and sort of count ourselves out.
For me, it's over. I AM AMERICAN. I am also smart and considerate, humble and strongly motivated to engage with the world. These things do not make me separate from the American identity, but in fact describe it! I am so so proud of my blue passport, and I absolutely will not apologize for it any more. There are stupid assholes of every ethnicity just as there are wonderfully brilliant people from every state in the world. There happen to be a lot of kind, creative and worldly people from the USA, so I suggest the world get to know them.
So the next time someone tells you that you aren't like an American, or as one very nice but confused Dutch boy told me, "You don't match my vision of American girls at all...", feel free to use my line:
"I am exactly an American girl. You just need to expand your vision, my friend."
3 comments:
Wonderfully stated. Reminds me of a big guy at U of Hyderabad who shared this when I told him I was American: "But I thought ALL Americans were FAT"! I replied that "I used to think all Indians were skinny"
Great post! And I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your last line.
:) i love you.
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